Learning to Be Weak

Yes, indeed! I tell you, when you were younger, you put on your clothes and went where you wanted. But when you grow old, you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and carry you where you do not want to go. " John 21:18 (CJB) 

I do not like to take verses out of context, but I remember the first time this one popped into my head. My father had a botched operation and could not swallow for a month. I watched my sweet, kind, dad turn into a mad man before my very eyes, hitting nurses, cussing us out, and repeating over and over again, "I just want to go home." We finally had to restrain him much of the time and it was absolutely heartbreaking! That verse started coming into my head quite often after that because for the next four months, he constantly spoke only of going home, and had to go from hospital to nursing home in order to get better.

As a home health care aide, I work with people who are suffering because of illness or dementia and old age, and have learned that this is a common thing to hear, "I just want to go home." I have to dress these dear people, bath them, feed them, and do many other things that I will not speak of, but you get the idea. Do you think they like it that I have to do this? No! As hard as I may try to help people keep their dignity, many times I come home with hair missing, scratches, and bruises because people hate losing their ability to do things for themselves. They are not fighting me - they are fighting their loss of independence and control of their lives. After all, don't we spend most of our lives trying to be strong like the "world" tells us to?

The day will come when I will eventually be in this state, whether it be illness, old age, or perhaps the  possibility of prison or captivity of some sort. How will I handle it, I wonder? I pray I always remember what Paul said:

2 Corinthians 12:9-10
but he told me, "My grace is enough for you, for my power is brought to perfection in weakness." Therefore, I am very happy to boast about my weaknesses, in order that the Messiah's power will rest upon me. Yes, I am well pleased with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions and difficulties endured on behalf of the Messiah; for it is when I am weak that I am strong.

Learning how to be weak is one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. I hope I get it right one day.